a guy walks into a country pub, bruised, bleeding, and his clothes disheveled.

"A leopard just ran up behind me, and pushed me over hard! A leopard! And then it seemed to regret what it had done, and ran away!"

The bartender seemed perfectly unsurprised.

"Aye. Ye just met Father Smith. No kinder more caring pastor was there ever. But ya see, he found a lamp with a genie. He asked that he might always be a loving shepherd for this village.

But he was bad about speaking in Spoonerisms..."